Presidential Messages

Dear Friends,

Not that many years ago Elizabeth and I rented an apartment in Venice, Italy for a month where we hosted 2 of our closest friends from N.Y.C. for a week. In but a number of hours after their arrival one of our friends became totally transformed by the city, to the point where her wife leaned across the dinner table from her and asked; “Who are You?”  For years the retelling of that story has made us laugh.  Today not so much.  Most mornings I find myself staring into the mirror and now asking myself “who are You?”  The answer does not always elicit a smile.

Life’s timeline and its commensurate expectations and experiences have been thrown off the tracks by a deadly disease and a barrage of messaging that basically says do nothing in order to keep breathing.  Yes, I want to keep breathing, but breath alone does not a life make nor does it help answer the question “who are you?” I too feel depleted by the anger, frustration, and fear that is a byproduct of our new Coronavirus existence.  I am barely comforted by the CDC’s effort to ease my worries by assuring me that “it’s not just those over the age of 65 who are at an increased risk for severe illness.”  There is no joy in knowing that we are all in jeopardy.  Therefore, I work to ignore the doomsters and discard the “woe is me feelings” that engulf us all. 

>Despite historical evidence that speaks of humankind’s ability to adapt to change a 2016 article in Psychology Today asserts that axiom is not entirely correct. The article explains that a 1970’s study on change indicated that when radical change occurs 2/3 of the people affected face the danger of both physically and emotionally falling apart.  However, 1/3 don’t just survive they thrive. They thrive not because they are smarter or younger or occupy a more important place in society. They thrive because instead of dwelling on the “good old days” they focus on planning for the future and creating even better days.  They exhibit what is called “existential courage.” Instead of looking into their past and bemoaning the loss of what was they put their energy into figuring out what they can do now to respond to the “new” world around them.

What can we do to feel relevant and at peace with who and where we are today?   For me, it’s continuing to do some of the same things I’ve always done while exploring new interests and new ideas. I read and reread a variety of texts looking for alternative ways to approach the unknown. Life is still a gift albeit today wrapped in crumpled newspaper rather than the shiny material we prefer. My position as President of CBI has been a G-D send.   A good part of each day is committed to preserving our shul by working to build its future.  That effort has helped me to answer the question “Who are you?”  I am pretty much the same person I was when this mess started except that now I’m masked and on a leash!

With hope,

Dorothy